// --------------------------------------
// Display Random Quotes
// Quotes Array Function 

function makeArray(len) {
    for (var k = 0; k < len; k++) this[k] = null;
this.length = len;
}

// Quotation array

ideas = new makeArray(83);
ideas[0] = "Don't squat with your spurs on.";
ideas[1] = "Don't judge folks by their relatives.";
ideas[2] = "Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a distance.";
ideas[3] = "Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.";
ideas[4] = "Never miss a good chance to shut up.";
ideas[5] = "Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.";
ideas[6] = "The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back into your pocket.";
ideas[7] = "Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong.";
ideas[8] = "A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.";
ideas[9] = "Words that soak into your ears are whispered... not yelled.";
ideas[10] = "Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.";
ideas[11] = "Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.";
ideas[12] = "Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.";
ideas[13] = "It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.";
ideas[14] = "You cannot unsay a cruel word.";
ideas[15] = "Every path has a few puddles.";
ideas[16] = "When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.";
ideas[17] = "The best sermons are lived, not preached.";
ideas[18] = "Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway.";
ideas[19] = "Live a good, honorable life.<br />Then when you get older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time.";
ideas[20] = "Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't botherin' you none.";
ideas[21] = "If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.";
ideas[22] = "Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.";
ideas[23] = "The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with,<br />watches you from the mirror every mornin'.";
ideas[24] = "Always drink upstream from the herd.";
ideas[25] = "Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.";
ideas[26] = "Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.";
ideas[27] = "If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence,<br />try orderin' somebody else's dog around.";
ideas[28] = "Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.";
ideas[29] = "The easiest way to eat crow is while it's still warm.<br />The colder it gets, the harder it is to swaller.";
ideas[30] = "If it don't seem like it's worth the effort, it probably ain't.";
ideas[31] = "It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.";
ideas[32] = "Don't worry about bitin' off more'n you can chew;<br />your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger'n you think.";
ideas[33] = "Perceptions are.";
ideas[34] = "Generally, you ain't learnin' nothing when your mouth's a-jawin'.";
ideas[35] = "Tellin' a man to git lost and makin' him do it are two entirely different propositions.";
ideas[36] = "If you're ridin' ahead of the herd,<br />take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there with ya.";
ideas[37] = "When you give a personal lesson in meanness to a critter or to a person,<br />don't be surprised if they learn their lesson.";
ideas[38] = "When you're throwin' your weight around,<br />be ready to have it thrown around by somebody else.";
ideas[39] = "Always take a good look at what you're about to eat.<br />It's not so important to know what it is, but it's sure crucial to know what it was.";
ideas[40] = "Never approach a bull from the front, a horse from the rear, or a fool from any direction.";
ideas[41] = "Behind every successful rancher is a wife who works in town.";
ideas[42] = "When you lose, don't lose the lesson.";
ideas[43] = "Talk slowly, think quickly.";
ideas[44] = "Never ask a barber if you need a haircut.";
ideas[45] = "You can't tell how good a man or a watermelon is 'til they get thumped.<br />Character shows up best when tested.";
ideas[46] = "If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen are defrocked,<br />shouldn't it follow that cowboys would be deranged?";
ideas[47] = "There never was a horse that couldn't be rode;<br />Never was a cowboy who couldn't be throwed.";
ideas[48] = "Talk low, talk slow, and don't say too much.";
ideas[49] = "Courage is being scared to death - and saddling up anyway.";
ideas[50] = "A Cowboy is a man with guts and a horse.";
ideas[51] = "It is easier to get an actor to be a cowboy than to get a cowboy to be an actor.";
ideas[52] = "Boots, chaps and cowboy hats. Nothin' else matters.";
ideas[53] = "Nature gave us all something to fall back on, and sooner or later we all land flat on it.";
ideas[54] = "Whoever said a horse was dumb, was dumb.";
ideas[55] = "Nobody ever drowned in his own sweat.";
ideas[56] = "Speak your mind, but ride a fast horse.";
ideas[57] = "Are you gonna Cowboy Up or lie there and bleed?";
ideas[58] = "Winning ain't everything but losing ain't fun either.";
ideas[59] = "Before cussing the boss, saddle your horse.";
ideas[60] = "Riding: the art of keeping the horse between you and the ground.";
ideas[61] = "Life is hard, but its harder when you're stupid.";
ideas[62] = "Never drink unless you're alone or with somebody.";
ideas[63] = "Fast is good but accurate is better.";
ideas[64] = "There's many theories about arguin' with a woman. None of them work.";
ideas[65] = "It's hard to put a foot in a closed mouth.";
ideas[66] = "When in doubt, let your horse do the thinkin'.";
ideas[67] = "Never kick a cow patty on a hot day.";
ideas[68] = "Never slap a mans back if he's chew'n tobacco."; 
ideas[69] = "Scars are cowboy tattoos with better stories.";
ideas[70] = "Sure you can trust the Government, ask any Indian.";
ideas[71] = "Tie my corpse on my horse and send me home.";
ideas[72] = "You can not make a pig whistle!<br />First, they do not know how to, and secondly, they do not like to."
ideas[73] = "Size does matter, the bigger your buckle the better."; 
ideas[74] = "Don't wake a sleepin' rattler.";
ideas[75] = "Your buckle don't shine in the dirt, get up."; 
ideas[76] = "Admire that big horse son, but saddle that small one.";
ideas[77] = "Never get up before breakfast, but if you have to...eat breakfast first!";
ideas[78] = "Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.";
ideas[79] = "It's better to be a has-been than a never-was.";
ideas[80] = "Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock."; 
ideas[81] = "Don't spoil his fun, let him play with it.";
ideas[82] = "I reckon this is gonna hurt a little."; 
// Seed Function
function rand(n) {
seed = (0x015a4e35 * seed) % 0xfffffff;
return (seed >> 20) % n;
}

// Random function
var rightnow = new Date();
var seed = rightnow.getTime() % 0x7fffffff;